Call out to the Lake District
It was my turn to do the Monday run, I met up with the other Leeds based engineer for breakfast, he gave me his pile of paperwork and expenses receipts etc. Asked me to obtain four PIR’s and a box of batteries whilst I was there, and we parted company to complete a day’s work.
Around 15:00 I set off the office in Manchester arriving at just after four, helping myself to a coffee and meeting with my supervisor, Jim. He said that around five all the regions engineers would be attending a ‘catch up’ meeting and I was welcome to stay and join in.
Sure enough, there was Jim, another supervisor, the branch manager and around twenty engineers arrived and crammed into the tiny showroom.
After the catch-up meeting, the engineers described some of the funny situations that had occurred since the last meeting, some six months earlier. After the tale telling dried, my supervisor, Jim had a story to tell, his was one of the best I had ever heard.
Jim said, it was last Friday and almost five o’clock, he was just reaching over to the phone to flick it on to night service, when it rang. Like a fool he picked the phone up, on the other end of the line was a distraught lady.
Is that Security Centres she asked, he said it was and she went on to say that her new alarm installation had been completed half an hour ago, then through tears and sobbing she said, you will have to come and see what your engineers have done.
He went on to say that the company has been using sub-contractors so anything could have happened. At this point, he had everyone in the room’s attention, where was she, asked one.
Jim replied only in the Lake District of course, a four-hour drive at this time of day on a Friday. Did she say what the problem was, asked another engineer, no she would not say on the phone, she insisted I drive to her house where she would show me the problem.
He set off to drive from central Manchester to Workington in rush hour. He explained that he could not stop thinking about what he was going to see, was the house flooded, or even on fire.
Finally he arrived after a stop off for food on the motorway, it was almost 10:00pm, the lady he had spoken to answered the door and he told her he was Jim, a supervisor from the alarm company and showed her ID.
At this she asked him inside and ushered him into the downstairs loo. Look she said in a distraught voice. Look what your engineers have done.
At this point you could have heard a pin drop in the room, all were intently focussed on Jim waiting to know what the engineers had done, one could no longer wait, so what had they done? he asked. Jim, with a twinkle in his eye replied, there was a floater in the toilet.
The whole room gasped, is that all one said, another asked so she wanted you to drive all the way from here to flush her toilet, another gasped, when another made himself heard. What did you do Jim, flush it, and charge her for a reset? At which point the room descended into chaotic laughter and disbelief.